Celebrity Roast

There is something about modern celebrity that I wonder about.

What exactly are the talents of Britney Spears or Jessica Simpson?

Am I being unfair?

Yes they are very attractive women. Well, Simpson is. Not convinced by Britney.

Am I asking too much?

Celebrity is quite different from talent.

Take Paris Hilton. She certainly has a talent for publicity, it seems she can hardly engage in an intimate moment without it appearing on the internet or the front page of every tabloid magazine and newspaper on the planet - and now an Osbourne's style TV show.

I watched Paris' TV road trip show a couple of times. Can't fairly comment on modern media if I don't consume it. To be fair to Paris; the publicity is usually unwanted, isn't it (Yeah right - to coin a phrase.

What was I thinking? A momentary lapse.

My real issue with bimbo celebrity (and I am using that as a blanket term) is that the media/publicity machine churns blonde, beautiful girls with the same intensity as the porn industry.

Young men and women are consumed for their superficial appeals. watching the Australian talk show host Rove McManus on TV last night pressed the point home. He spoke with Lindsay Lohan (the star - or should I say supporting actress to Herbie) in the Love Bug remake. Poor wee thing. She seemed care worn and world weary about the effect of being pursued by the paprazzi and being vilified for her lack of obvious talent - other than her obvious talents*. The girl is 19 years old for crying out loud! Give her a break.

On the other hand I have discovered a very modern perfomer. David Bowie, perhaps you've heard of him. Listen to Aladdin Sane sometime. It is unbeleiveable. When I was younger I thought it was tosh. Now I find it interesting and challenging. But imagine someone blogging back then in the early 70's (what do you mean they didn't blog in the 70's?)

'It will never last...
you can't whistle to it...
Whatever happened to Vera Lynne?..."

I'm going to rack my brains and spend time with a very big pile of magazines.

Let's figure out what's goin' on here and develop a unifying theory of contemporary celebrity.

A celebration of celebrity. Comin' up...on The One & Only.

*Which Disney reduced using computer generated imaging (CGI) to be more appealing to a family audience. By the way, you may have heard it here first Lohan is set to play opposite Tom Cruise in the next thrilling installment of Mission Impossible 3. I'm aquiver.


  1. "Let's figure out what's goin' on here and develop a unifying theory of contemporary celebrity..." (Well, now that you made my wheels turn on a Sunday with coffee...)

    I don't think you are being unfair when you ask - what exactly are the talents of such "celebrities" like Spears & Simpson. Maybe it's my 30+ age bracket, maybe I just don't "see" their appealing persona. Afterall, I care less for either singing, don't think either are attractive, and Paris (as she was once quoted as saying "I'm a brand"). Well yes - almost a smart and dead on quote from a blonde.

    I agree Celebrity is different from talent. It seems my take on contemporary celebritisms is based on momentary "hype" tied to the brand name. After all, it seems just as long as the "celebrity" can keep up the "hype" then they grace the pages of news stands - without little being drawn to their songs, developments, or anything constructive towards what they "actually do". Interesting when you think about it.

    As for you momentary lapse, well, to be fair to any celebrity, it's the career and lifestyle they choose - therefore - if they didn't want to be famous they should of stuck to something out of the spotlight.

    So...(before I blanter away the day on this issue).Fortune's theory on contemporary celebrity...

    "...those that continually hype the brand name, market the brand name as diverse entrapreneurs (from music to clothing lines) and grace newstands with antics (right or wrong). Not based on talent, but based on how the brand name appeals and thrives for years. Until such celebrity gets tired and decides to start writing children's novels or goes into theatre and proclaims this is what they should of done years ago. Then at that time, we put them into the hall of fame or give them an award for their contributions to the industry - and then proclaim it was based on talent."


  2. "A sign of celebrity is often that their name is worth more than their services." - Daniel J. Boorstin


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